"Remember," said the guide, "if you meet a native, keep your eyes on her chest."
A tourist smirked. "Really?"
"Don't, under any circumstances, let your gaze drift higher."
"You're having us on," said another.
"I mean it. Early settlers named this planet Gorgonia for good reason."
"Broke a toof," mumbled the young vampire.
His sire glared. "That bodybuilder should have been easy! What happened?"
"Went for the jugular vein-"
"Just like I told you."
"-but hit a tendon instead."
"What shoddy workmanship!" The craftsman sneered at the old plate.
"There's a maker's mark on the bottom," offered his apprentice.
He turned it upside down. "Let's find out who-Oh. Actually, it's quite decent. Perhaps made during an early phase."
"Gran?"
"Yes, dear?"
"I found this old photo, and-"
"Let's see. Ooh, yes. That bit part was my big break. Da da-da da da-da da da-da da, I'm siiinging... Help me up, will you?"
"Are you sure-"
"Right. I skipped like this, and then-Ouch! My hip!"
"Doc! Drawer 3's rattling!"
Sigh. Newbies. "Being declared dead wrongly is an urban myth."
A bang sounded from the body store.
"... But I'll take a look. Just to reassure you."
Hanging off its hinges, the mortuary fridge door was the vampire's first victim. Richer pickings followed.
Jake choked on his drink. "You can't have seen a unicorn! They're extinct."
"I know what I saw," said Ben. "It turned into a man and slipped away."
"Sure."
"Be like that!" Ben stomped out.
Jake rubbed a scar on his forehead and sighed. Another witness to silence.
I stare through the glass. Grubby fingermarks obscure my view of the bracelet. My hands tremble. Sweat breaks out on my brow.
A latent compulsion, therapists say. Don't give in. Easy advice to give.
I. Cannot. Resist.
Sighing, I fetch the window cleaning spray.
Kat pouted. "Why do I always have to be home by sunset?"
"It's safer," said her father. "Only the dead walk by night."
"Dumb superstition."
"Yes, but..." Her brother checked his fangs in the mirror. "We shouldn't let on that we thrive under sunlight, too."
Anonymous in hooded robes, he addressed a random guest. "I'm Joe." His usual pseudonym.
"Mij Senoj. And my wife, Asil."
Joe sighed. Spelling your name backwards. How unoriginal. "Is this your first orgy? Who's your friend?"
The bulky figure beside them gurgled, "Uhluhtc."
"I thought you didn't mind an audience," said the scrub nurse.
"Normally, no." With a glare at at the salivating vulture, the surgeon growled, "but that one gives me the creeps."